Why is grad school so much work?

Can't they just give me my PhD already? Ugh, I'm so tired! My mom is coming out to Berkeley this weekend for my birthday, which is great, but that means I'm going to be severely limited in time to do my work. I'm a pretty bright spark, I figured this out before she got here. I've therefore been working like a drunk panda on crack for a week to get ahead of the work curve (I don't really know if drunk pandas take crack or if they work harder than non-crackhead sober pandas, but it feels appropriate). Inebriated pandas aside, I taught my three weekly sections this morning and have finished mounds of reading, so now I'm looking forward to a few days of relaxing and eating birthday pie.